Believe it or not when you get only partial obedience it is not also partial disobedience - it's your child trying!!
A little Say What You See® when you see them trying and you'll likely get full obedience and a deepening in your connection!!
Here's a Powerful Example
I have rules for my youngest about Sharpie markers because, frankly, my walls and even my furniture have Sharpie on them. I ended up hiding them away because they were such a huge temptation for her. And then one day she found one. I was ready for a struggle but I kept my Language of Listening® training close at hand. Using Say What You See® I said "You found a Sharpie marker!" She immediately held out the marker to give it to me but then pulled it back towards herself (partial obedience - she was trying!) Assuming she only had good intentions I continued with "You found a Sharpie marker and started giving it to me! You know how to follow the rules!" Well, her eyes lit up and she proudly handed the marker over to me. Wow! And the best part?? Ever since, whenever she finds a Sharpie she brings it right to me. That issue, now a non-issue, became the path for empowerment, for shaping her belief about herself.
Coach Your Kids
Language of Listening® teaches us to coach our kids in a way that empowers them to manage their own behavior WHILE keeping within our boundaries! That means we often stop seeing the same behaviors over and over AND we don't have to micro-manage our kids' behavior for them! Using that simple step of SAY WHAT YOU SEE® turned a potentially frustrating situation into one that was nurturing! And to that I have to say YAHOO!!
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